sadistic tendencies

†•there’s nothing that won’t change.. there’s nothing that wouldn’t end.. that’s just the way things are..•†

i don’t know what it is.. but i’m tormented by this uneasiness everyday.. my heart is murmuring.. that’s why i want to tear at it until blood spills…

just got out of the hospital.. well, actually, it was my mother who had undergone an operation.. and i accompanied her there at the hospital.. so, that’s the reason why i’ve been gone for like.. 5 days.. hehe.. ^_~v anyways, many things happened while we’re there.. well, actually, not so many.. haha!! ‘coz all i do there was eat, sleep, watch TV, talk on the phone.. haha!! well, of course, i also helped my mom.. ^_^

hmm.. actually, my friends are supposed to visit at the hospital.. but then, something hit me.. and i didn’t want them to come anymore.. i don’t know why it did at that time, but it really did.. i was really affected by that thought.. i kept thinking about it and developed a headache.. damn it.. *sigh* i guess it really did bug me.. i mean, i was always staring at space.. i didn’t know what to do or say.. it just hit me.. i know.. right then and there.. that those were emotions larger than any sin and sweeter than any punishment..

*sigh*

i don’t really know why i thought of those things at that time.. it’s just that i really thought of it.. it was just stuck on my mind.. but then, after a day, i was back to normal.. smiling and laughing.. and i decided to just stop thinking about it.. because it won’t do me any good.. ahihi..^^ so, that’s it..

okay.. so, i think that’s it.. oh, by the way, that thought.. that feeling.. it was jealousy..

"Nobody can stop the flow of time, but a moment captured in the frame of the heart will never disappear. That will be shown at the bottom of their hearts will always give off a great feeling.. sweet.. and bitter…"

This entry was posted on Sunday, May 29th, 2005 at 8:59 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.